Ieri am dat peste un articol intitulat generic “10 LIFE LESSONS TO EXCEL IN YOUR 30S“, pe care era sa-l ignor rapid, trecandu-l la categoria “inca un tip care a schimbat prefixul si spune blabla-uri subiective si generalitati aspirationale”.
Din fericire, am dat click din greseala, l-am citit si mi-au placut cateva idei interesante. Le reiau pe cele care mi-au placut. Poate si pentru ca articolul e format din sfaturile primite de la cititorii de peste 37 de ani ai blogului lui Mark Manson.
Despre bani, investitii, economii de “zile negre” si nesiguranta zilei de maine. Eu incerc de ceva timp sa ma tin de procentul de 10% pusi deoparte, dar nu am gasit ciorapi indeajuns de mari pentru atata banet.
1. START SAVING FOR RETIREMENT NOW, NOT LATER
- Keep an “emergency fund” — there were tons of horror stories about people getting financially ruined by health issues, lawsuits, divorces, bad business deals, etc.
- Don’t spend frivolously. Don’t buy a home unless you can afford to get a good mortgage with good rates.Don’t invest in anything you don’t understand. Don’t trust stockbrokers.
Despre sanatate, excese si impactul pe care actiunile noastre de acum il au asupra trupului nostru de peste cativa ani. Planul pe 2015 e sa fac upgrade la sport si downgrade la burta.
2. START TAKING CARE OF YOUR HEALTH NOW, NOT LATER
- The way you treat your body has a cumulative effect; it’s not that your body suddenly breaks down one year, it’s been breaking down all along without you noticing. This is the decade to slow down that breakage.
- We all know to take care of our health. We all know to eat better and sleep better and exercise more and blah, blah, blah. But just as with the retirement savings, the response from the older readers was loud and unanimous: get healthy and stay healthy now.
Despre oamenii cu care nu te poti intelege, vampiri emotionali si activitati care iti fac viata si munca mai grea, mai frustranta, mai complicata. Zambeste mai mult.
3. DON’T SPEND TIME WITH PEOPLE WHO DON’T TREAT YOU WELL
- “Learn how to say “no” to people, activities and obligations that don’t bring value to your life.” (Hayley, 37)
- “Stay away from miserable people… they will consume you, drain you.” (Gabriella, 43)
- People typically struggle with boundaries because they find it difficult to hurt someone else’s feelings, or they get caught up in the desire to change the other person or make them treat them the way they want to be treated. This never works. And in fact, it often makes it worse. As one reader wisely said, “Selfishness and self-interest are two different things. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.”
In completarea ideilor de la punctul 3. Rebecca e cam dramatica, dar ideea principala ramane aceea de a fi alaturi de cei care conteaza pentru tine, chiar si in cazul evenimentelor nefericite, nu doar la petreceri, vacante sau aniversari.
4. BE GOOD TO THE PEOPLE YOU CARE ABOUT
- “Tragedy happens in everyone’s life, everyone’s circle of family and friends. Be the person that others can count on when it does. I think that between 30 and 40 is the decade when a lot of shit finally starts to happen that you might have thought never would happen to you or those you love. Parents die, spouses die, babies are still-born, friends get divorced, spouses cheat… the list goes on and on. Helping someone through these times by simply being there, listening and not judging is an honor and will deepen your relationships in ways you probably can’t yet imagine.” (Rebecca, 40)
Despre focus, procrastinare si stabilirea obiectivelor. Citeam zilele trecute un articol despre faptul ca cei care si-au realizat “cele mai mari vise” au fost si cei care au fost “nevoiti” sa renunte la alte obiective secundare, pentru a se concentra pe una sau doua directii principale de dezvoltare.
5. YOU CAN’T HAVE EVERYTHING; FOCUS ON DOING A FEW THINGS REALLY WELL
- “Biggest regrets I have are almost exclusively things I did *not* do.” (Sam, 47)
- “Less fear. Less fear. Less fear. I am about to turn 50 next year, and I am just getting that lesson. Fear was such a detrimental driving force in my life at 30. It impacted my marriage, my career, my self-image in a fiercely negative manner. I was guilty of: Assuming conversations that others might be having about me. Thinking that I might fail. Wondering what the outcome might be. If I could do it again, I would have risked more.” (Aida, 49)
Despre timpul petrecut cu familia (parinti si rude cu care te intelegi bine. As adauga si prietenii foarte buni), realizari si planuri de viitor.
9. INVEST IN YOUR FAMILY; IT’S WORTH IT
- “Spend more time with your folks. It’s a different relationship when you’re an adult and it’s up to you how you redefine your interactions. They are always going to see you as their kid until the moment you can make them see you as your own man. Everyone gets old. Everyone dies. Take advantage of the time you have left to set things right and enjoy your family.” (Kash, 41)
- “You’re too old to blame your parents for any of your own short-comings now. At 20 you could get away with it, you’d just left the house. At 30, you’re a grown-up. Seriously. Move on.
- “It’s never the ‘right time’ for children because you have no idea what you’re getting into until you have one. If you have a good marriage and environment to raise them, err on having them earlier rather than later, you’ll get to enjoy more of them.” (Cindy, 45)
Articolul complet, cu toate cele 10 sfaturi/idei e aici.